HOW SOCIAL MEDIA AFFECT US .

The use of social media has sky rocketed in the last decade. We are spending more and more time on Facebook,Instagram, Snapchat and Twitter. Whenever we have some free time, we check our news feed, to see if something new has happened. Whether we'd like to admit it or not, it's  changing why and how we do certain things; and especially how we look at them. Too much use of social media has been linked to higher levels of loneliness and depression. And we know that an entire new generation is growing up with lower self-esteem than all previous generations. Interestingly enough, people who browse socialmedia more often than others, seem to suffer the most. Let's take a look at why this is happening.

 One thing that social media does is that it shows us fake lives of others. When you scroll through Instagram or Facebook feed, what do you see? Everyone you know is always on exotic vacations,they have amazing dinner parties with friends, and they are in perfect relationships. And you? You are just sitting there, living your boring life, while everyone is always out there enjoying themselves. However this is far from the truth. The only thing that is shared through socialnetworks are the positive aspects of our lives. When you're going through difficult times you don't really want people to know that you're struggling.

 Most people are not going to share publiclythat they are feeling sad or depressed. So it's natural to only share the best momentsof our day. What happens is that we only see the highlightsof those people, but we think that their life is constantly this way. They don't show us behind the scenes, becausethat's not as exciting. But I assure you, they have a lot more problemsthan you might think. Let me show you an example that happened justthe other day. I went out with a friend of mine for a cupof coffee. And the only thing we talked about was herrelationship problem. She and her boyfriend have been fighting alot over the smallest things. She said she'll probably break up with him,since they can't stand each other anymore. But guess what happened later that day? She posted a picture on Instagram with herboyfriend, basically saying how he was the love of her life and how amazing their lifetogether was.

 The photo got tons of likes and comments,basically saying how perfect they were for each other. This behavior is toxic. Like millions of other people she is tryingto portray how great her life is, while simultaneously being depressed. This is what social media does. It makes people put a filter on their lives. What my friend is trying to portray to others,isn't the same as what is really going on. If you didn't know what was happening behindthe scenes and you saw her Instagram post, you would probably think, "Wow, look how greather life is. Mine is nothing like that, I wish I couldhave a relationship like hers." And this is exactly where low self esteemcomes from. You might wonder if there is something wrongwith you, because your life doesn't look that way. Everyone who posts on social networks seemsto have their life figured out, while you don't know even know in which direction you'regoing. But most people don't have anything figuredout, even if they are making it seem that way. You just have to remember that behind thescenes, most people live regular boring lives, so there's no need to feel discouraged.

 You might think that I hate social media. But really I don't. However I urge you to think about how youspend your time on it. Social media is a tool, and like all othertools it depends on how you use it. You can find loads of inspiration or information,which will motivate you or add value to your life. It's through Youtube, a social platform, thatyou found this video after all. But you don't want to get sucked in and spendtons of your time on it, especially since it's designed to be highly addictive. The average user now spends more than 2 hoursa day across all social networks. This is quite alarming, because when you thinkabout it, that's a lot of time.

 We are not enjoying and living our life, butinstead we're mindlessly consuming irrelevant content. Since you probably don't want to completelyquit social media and become a hermit, let's take a look at how to use the platforms moreefficiently. One thing you should do is unfriend uselessfriends. Many people have hundreds of friends acrossall platforms. But are they really meaningful friendships? Of course not. An average person has 1-3 close friends. The rest are superficial friendships. If you don't want to unfriend people you canstill unfollow them, and become more selective about who you follow. Like that guy you spoke to once, who justposts pictures of his cats every single day. Unfollowed.

This way when you check your news feed it'snot full of clutter and irrelevant information. And don't be afraid of missing out. If something really important happens, someonewill probably tell you about it. Ironically when you're on your phone and socialmedia all day, you don't realize that what you're actually missing out on is real life. Nowadays we take our phones every where withus. And a lot of us have this habit of constantly checking our phone for notifications. Every time we are waiting in line, or arejust bored, we pull out our phone and mindlessly check social media. Mainly out of habit. The solution here is to remove those appsfrom your phone or block all the notifications. This way we're not just a click away frombeing pulled in to social media rabbit hole.

 We know that once we start we just have tocheck every single post. So not having the app, there is no real temptationto check your phone mindlessly. Yes, you could still go to instagram.com orfacebook.com website if you really wanted to. But there is this additional barrier of resistancethat you have to overcome. This time it's not just one click away andyou won't check it just out of habit, but it's going to be a conscious decision. What we really need to do is put more thoughtin how we spend our free time. If we don't have anything to do at any givenmoment, then these addictive apps will always be an appealing option. So I recommend you fill this free time withsomething of more quality. Preferably with something that will actuallybenefit you. I urge you to look at how much time you'respending on social media every day.

 Don't be one of those people who never lookup from their phone or computer. Real life is going on around you. So be present. You don't want to spend your time in virtual reality with people that you don't even know, that just post fake social updates. It's ok to be bored and just let your mind wander sometimes. But it's even better to live your life in a way that excites you. I still use social media myself, however I have restricted it to once per day. And because I have removed all the useless friends, I'm done checking it in 10 minutes.. This way I don't miss out on anything and I don't waste my time constantly checking my news feed, waiting for someone to post something. If social media is not motivating you, inspiring you, challenging you to be better, then it's time to reflect on why you even have it.

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